I know to be blogging about this is a lil absurd (especially coming from me) cos I don't talk about this except with my sisters and my other newfound international friends fans in the forum. But nevermind, I'm a lil off the scale when it comes to being normal anyway so what the heck.

It feels like I've gone back to my younger days when I was a mindless teen going ga-ga over the likes of BSB, N'Sync, Benicio Del Toro, MJ and Johnny Depp that I would keep their photos and cutouts from magazines. Of cos, I've since threw them away in the garbage bin. Now I'm more stable. *laughs*

Unlike Hollywood stars, who think so highly of themselves, there are celebrities particularly Asian ones, whom you can actually communicate and become friends with. Not that I'm one with any of them. *dammit* But I'm pretty close. :) Hollywoodies are a tad too far-fetched for us peanuts, no?

When you're exposed to various people through the media or not, incoincidentally you learn about their culture. Ah, I should have taken anthropology instead...

I've gone off track here. I wanted to blog about anti-fans. Fans from across the globe varies. In the western countries, fans become stalkers and antis kill. But the most extreme so far that I've seen through documentaries has got to be the Koreans. They're scary-mary. They will torment you, stalk you, curse you and yes, kill you even. They'll do it slowly and painfully. It's very psychological.

That's no wonder why many high-profilers there fall into deep depression and eventually commit suicide. That's when we realise that they're human beings too. It's sad really. Not to get affected is not as easy as it being said.

Like some celebrity 'friends' that I know, it was sad knowing that they couldn't cope with it and that it drives them mad. Sad to know that the upfront they portray isn't real. Sad to know that despite them trying hard to hide it... it shows on their very faces.

Meddled emotions being cooped up like that is not healthy and not safe. I'm not talking about celebrities alone but us in general.

I've always believed that being tortured mentally is far more worse then being tortured physically. Wounds will heal and some scars will fade but memories will stay and haunt you for as long as you let it live. It kills you inside.

Just yesterday, the news about a horrifying massacre at Virginia Tech. A 23 year-old South Korean killed 32 people and shot himself after that. It earned him the title of the "deadliest murderer in American history" tho' I don't think that's true. Have you heard of Ted Bundy, that b*****d? "Deadliest shooting rampage in modern U.S. history" is right.

Seriously, I feel sorry more for the gunman. His disturbed writings apparently raised concern to others now. Why now? The writings were a call for help but as usual, were ignored. Because of that, many other lives were lost as well.

It's cruel what they do, but more often than not, they don't know what they were doing. And many criminals had a troubled past that lead them to who or what they are now. It's sad to know what they go through.

What's sadder is that help is often out of reach till it's too late.



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